Week 7 – Thailand (Part 2)

Pai

Writing this battling a shockingly bad hangover after my day of tipsy tubing in Pai yesterday. My arse is cut to shreds as they don’t warn you that when you’re going down the river in a rubber ring that your cheeks are scraping against the rocks for the majority of it. I am bruised all over, emotionally and physically. Kidding. We’ll circle back to the experience of tubing, safe to say this part of Thailand is Aya Napa meets Hackney, but definitely more Aya Napa (in my humble opinion), which is a shame because it’s absolutely beautiful. Anyway, let’s go back to my first night on my tod.

Turning up to Stamps in Chiang Mai was pretty bloody terrifying. Walking in amidst groups of people who you automatically assume are all BFF’s and trying to decide which group looks the most welcoming was an experience that challenged all the facets of my anxiety. But, I did it. Quite quickly I ended up chit chatting to people, including a lovely American girl (women? Why does this sound odd to say?) who was sadly leaving that afternoon. Just my luck. I also ended up chatting to a not-so-lovely American guy who proceeded to talk at me for about an hour and a half listing off every country/city/village/hamlet/field he’d been to in his life. I was far too polite and sat through it nodding, although I decided to skiddadle when he started ripping into London despite never having been. It made me strangely defensive. Don’t get me wrong, London isn’t for everyone, but if you’ve never even been… wind your fucking neck in. Anyway, I settled into my dorm room which was super cute and had these little pods which felt nice and private. I got myself ready and showered, took myself out for dinner at Kat’s Kitchen and ended up talking to a lovely Italian man in his 50’s about the power of Vipassana meditation. I necked back my Chang and headed back to the hostel for the pub crawl. I was feeling very nervous at this point. Who would I talk to?! Where would I sit?! Will people want to talk to me even though I’m ginger?! I perched next to a friendly looking bunch and really vibed with two of the girlies, Penny and Isobel. There were also a couple of British guys who were nice (one of whom I had a lil smoochie woochie with. A real lad – off brand but fun) A week later Penny and I are sharing a private room and she is truly one of the funniest people I’ve ever met. She’s from Perth and her favourite tik tokker is Maddie Grace Jepson, so you can imagine why we vibed. Anyway, the three of us spent the evening together, had a boogie to some trashy house music and the night ended with a Nos balloon in the smoking area of a dingy bar. This is what I mean when I say Napa, literal Brits abroad. The hangover the next day was a hefty one, waking up in my little pod with no one to debrief with was quite a lonely feeling, but one I’m sure I will get used to. Plus, I guess I can just debrief with myself in the mirror? I got myself together and went for a solo breakfast and coffee. Penny then came and met me and we spent the afternoon perched in a park on my sarong getting to know each other. It was really lovely. That night we headed to the famous Sunday night market which was very cool, although a bit of a sensory overload on a hangover. I managed to make room for about 5 different dishes, including sticky rice and pork, dumplings and a waffle. My new favourite thing is having multiple street food dishes over an evening, because I simply must try it all.

The next day I was up and at em for an early coach to Pai. It was going to be the monastery next, but Isobel and Penny were heading to Pai, and my new traveller vibe is easy, breezy and flexible. So Pai it was! The journey didn’t begin quite as planned as my ticket was actually to Mae Hong Song and I thought it would be a case of just hopping off in Pai. Unfortunately not, it didn’t work like this and three people working at the bus station were talking amongst themselves in Thai and quite blatantly laughing at my mistake. Mortifying. Anyway, the driver was kind enough to make a detour on the coach and drop me off in Pai, so off we were on the three and a bit hour bus journey up and through the beautiful rolling hills of Northern Thailand. I arrived at lunch time and made my sweaty way to my lovely little Bamboo hut (£12!) that I’d treated myself to for my first evening. After a social weekend I was in need of some recharging, so I took myself for a massage (obviously lol!!!), facetimed lovely Temi, and spent the rest of the evening on my hammock watching Drive to Survive and pondering on life. 

The next morning I went to a Vinyasa Flow yoga class at a lovely studio called Bodhi Tree where I had a good sweat. I tried to chat to the woman next to me in the class, but not sure she was feeling my vibe/she had no interest in chatting – humbled. Anyway, I met Penny and Isobel after the class to check into our hostel called Buzzas which I ended up staying at for 5 nights. Really lovely chill vibes, beautiful views and a POOL. Spent the day sitting on my arse and then ventured out into the centre with the gals for some food and drinks. This evening felt like it had various parts. First up we ate, (a lovely Pad Thai for me from a street vendor) and then we went to a couple of different bars. At about 9pm we decided to buy a joint since it’s legal here and why the frick not. The next hour was spent sitting by the river, crying laughing about a stone that we’d found. Ridiculous. I forget that when I smoke weed I am just uncontrollably laughing for a good two hours. At numerous points I definitely wet myself, not really sure what that says about my bladder control, but everything was so funny. We finished the night at my favourite bar here called Almost Famous, where we all had a beer and tried to converse but we were completely out of sync. We stumbled home at about midnight, and as seems to be the way when I smoke, my mind was running wild in bed as I just lay in bed laughing at myself basically. 

The next day Penny and I decided to rent motorbikes and do some sightseeing. We were both afraid initially, partly because travel insurance doesn’t cover motorbike accidents and also because we’d met so many people who’d fallen and scratched up their bodies. Including the American man from earlier who’d smashed up his front teeth. Although, he bragged to me about being drunk and on his phone while riding his bike so I don’t want to say some things happen for a reason…. Anyway, after making a pact that we were going to go SERIOUSLY slowly we were on our way. Toot toot. First up we stopped at Pam Bok waterfall which was about 6km away but at the speed we were going took about 3 hours. It was beautiful. Very serene and the water was absolutely freezing. After Pam Bok we mooched further along to Kho Ku So Bamboo Bridge which is literally a bamboo bridge about 800 metres long and runs through the rice fields. It was created a few years ago to make it easier for monks to get across the villages and is really beautiful. We scooted back and stopped for a dusky dinner overlooking the mountains and then spent the rest of the evening high because we are fucking STONERS, and like I said, easy, breezy and flexible. And cool. Penny and I spent about 30 minutes creating an entire improv scene over her Khao Soi. Once again I ate my way down the food market, at one point I even got a jacket potato which on reflection is actually quite embarrassing because I’m in Thailand. I distinctly remember eating this really fast so no one could see that I was stuffing my face with a huge potato while everyone else was immersing themselves in the culture. Another night spent laughing to myself in bed. 

The next day we’d all decided was the day to try the famous shroom shakes of Pai. Having only ever tried mushrooms once in Costa Rica and not really feeling much, I was pretty excited. We set off to Sunset bar, purchased what can only be described as a bottle of liquid moss and let the juice work its magic. I felt like this afternoon went on for ages and had a real sort of full circle experience. I felt really heavy and lovely at the beginning, everything looked super vivid and beautiful, but then about two hours in I started to ruminate on the fact that I am travelling alone and sent myself into a complete spiral. Classic. But, I finished the afternoon sitting with Penny and unpacking our thoughts and going to bed thinking we’d nailed the meaning of life. All in all, a fun experience. 

And so now we are at the penultimate day in Pai. Tibsy Tubing. An experience that I decided to just throw myself into because otherwise I think I’d probably have absolutely hated it. We’d booked it through Isobel’s hostel as it was a vibey mc vibe, so we turned up at 1pm, knocked back two joss shots (throwback!!) and were herded into groups on vans that were literally built for cattle. There were about 20 of us stood in the back of this van, getting up close and personal like sardines. We arrived at the beginning to about 400 other people with no clothes on ready to jump in the rings. It was honestly a wild scene and I did have a moment of “IS THIS ME?” when I was clambering into a rubber ring and chugging my fanta and vodka out of a plastic bottle. We floated down the river for about twenty minutes, the three of us holding each others feet so as not to lose each other in the sea of nudity. We stopped at a bar and us and the 398 other British people (joking but not far off) drank some more and danced to trashy hits. It was lots of fun, unlike anything I’d ever done before and not entirely sure I’d want to do it again, but still. I didn’t think I’d be comfortable standing around in a bikini all day but after a few shots and my fanta delight I was feeling CA-UTE in my navy get up. I think so far I’ve felt like in order to meet people I have to really throw myself into the party scene, but I’m also looking forward to meeting people in more of a chilled setting as opposed to everyone screaming at eachother over loud music and then feeling awkward when you bump into eachother the next day. After a few hours at this bar on the riverside, it was back into the rings for another twenty minutes of drunken floating to the finish line. We climbed off our rings and stumbled home to shower and get back out there on the LASH. We had a run in with an absolute twat in the restaurant who we overheard defending Andrew Tate to his table of female friends. There were about 8 people in this place, 7 of us women, so it was a real feminist moment when we all proceeded to let him know how deeply wrong he was and his only response was “Am I not allowed an opinion?!”. His argument was something about “Can’t someone who says a lot of bad things also say something good?” This was in reference to Andrew Tate, and I believe the answer is that somebody who unequivocally thinks women are sub-par and is also a potential sex trafficker, is not worth listening to. But that’s just little old me!!! Incredibly concerning to hear someone try and defend such a terrible human. He was also sitting in the restaurant topless, fucking lemon. 

The rest is all a bit blurry, but there were margaritas and a couple long island ice teas, hence the hangover today. 

I woke up this morning feeling like an actual troll but worth it for the good memories, particularly another Brit called Edward who was bizarrely honest and spent a good twenty minutes telling me how burnt I was. A shame really because I thought I’d caught a tan. Alas.

Anyway, I’ve spent the day eating (the 7/11’s here do an ICONIC cheese and ham toastie) and chilling by the pool. Penny and I are cosied up in our little private room, currently watching the cows in the field on our balcony with the dusty mountains in the background. We’re going to head off soon into town to find some dinner and deliberately put ourselves into a food coma. Tomorrow I’m off to Chiang Mai in the morning, and then we are both flying down south to Krabi to live that Island life for a little while. I’m definitely ready for a change of scenery and to mix it up a little bit. Here’s to the next part of my adventure, and also here’s to me getting Instagram because I would honestly be Larry the loner without it, it’s the only way people communicate out here?! My days of being the nomadic chic icon who doesn’t have social media are over, but, my follower count is well and truly on the UP. And finally, here’s to me pushing myself out of my comfort zone because with all the joy that comes with travelling it’s also quite terrifying navigating this on your own. Anyway, I’ll write again when I’m kicking back on the beach somewhere.

Until next time,

Lily xx